Top Ten Reasons to Donate to Penguin Conservation
T-minus 29 days and counting.
For everyone on the fence vis-á-vis donating, all me to persuade you:
10
No portion of your donation will go to protecting penguin-eating polar bears (if for no other reason than that polar bears are separated from penguins by an equator, several oceans and most of humanity).
09
Because someone must be on the front lines to assure that THIS never happens again.
08
I am shameless. I will do pretty much anything while in Antarctica for a large enough donation. (See reason number 4.)
07
Earth has only two poles. Pick a side. (South)
06
Impress all of your black-clad, hipster, graphic design friends with your original penguin conservation poster signed by the artist.
05
Penguins are undeniably the cutest birds on the planet. If they were common in temperate zones, they would thoroughly dominate icanhascheezburger.com. We wouldn’t even know kittens existed.
04
If I achieve my fundraising goal, I promise to swim nekkid amongst the icebergs of the Southern Ocean (for better or worse in full view of several cell-phone cameras).
03
If you’re just not that into penguins, your donation supporting research at the bottom of the globe will finally prove beyond a shadow of a doubt that the world is not flat. This has to count for something.
02
Shaw, gregarious and talented rockhopper penguin from the Riverbanks Zoo, personally approves of this cause. He told me this one day while trying to eat my shoelaces.
01
Don’t be beaten in a road race by a six-foot tall penguin ever again.
Donate online at FirstGiving.com »
– Dean
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